ARCHIVES - 1996 to FOREVER

Her eyes are rolled back in her head most of the time, and when they're not, she has a glassy-eyed look.

She's gasping for breath constantly, and I'm giving her the MS every two hours.

I was holding my hand on her chest, the side with the good lung, and there's a lot of gunk in there that she can't cough up, so I put on a patch that should dry some of that up, I hope, and make it a little easier for her.

It is said that they can hear every word that you say, and I tell her that I love her a lot... and I always have, ever since the day I decided that I did, many years ago.

Debbie and Chuck and Judy will be here shortly... Kim and Matt are already here, as are Jan and Tanna.

11:47
It is so painful watching her, talking to her... her pulse rate is increasing, and her hands and arms are clammy, while her head and torso are quite warm.

She is not actually in any pain... the drugs are taking care of that... but we are.

I told her that she didn't have to wait if she wanted to give up, Deb and Chuck would understand...

There are some pretty heavy storms between here and Emporia right now, right over the turnpike, so Deb and Chuck might be delayed somewhat... Deb's SUV is pretty high-profile, and they should be slowing down a bunch for heavy rain.....

Debbie et al got here about 13:50... the usual tears, the great hugs....

14:43... everyone is here now, except for Lacee... I haven't asked about her yet.

The nurse got here sometime in the meantime, and she pretty much confirmed what I thought... several hours, maybe more.

I talked to JD a few minutes ago, he's just now getting out of Houston.

20:37...
Karen died about 17:30 this evening, very peaceably, with family and friends surrounding her.

I have been making the phone calls, with a lot of help.

The Hospice nurse came over shortly after we called, and he called the funeral home.

She is no longer suffering.

She was such a wonderful woman, and that is such an empty room, and such an empty house, and such a big fucking hole in my heart.

Fuck cancer. Just fuck it.