ARCHIVES - 1996 to FOREVER

I drove over and she was looking pretty good, pretty chipper. She has been looking forward to this day.

Jan got there around 08:45, and the counsellor was supposed to be there around 09:00, but it was 09:45 before she showed up.

The counsellor is a very nice woman, and we talked for about 45 minutes. What Karen wanted to know was how to handle Lacee and her grief, and the other grandkids, of course.

The counsellor and I briefly discussed my atheism and then we went on to Karen's beliefs... she wants there to be a place where she can watch over her children and grandchildren, and that's OK with me that she can create that place in her head. I certainly don't have anything to offer her in that line, I'm afraid.

Pretty soon all of the people showed up, along with a box of old photos.

After visiting for quite a while in the main family room, we went to the dining room, where the food was ready.

After a very long blessing of the food and other matters by cousin Phil, who like to show off in such matters, we set about eating, and then went back to the photos again... this time outside, initially, then back in the main family area again.

I took a ride after lunch and went to the rose garden in Gage park, about six blocks away; I went to smoke, of course, but also to just get away for a few minutes.

I love people, but as groups get larger, my ability to sanely cope decreases rapidly....

And the rose garden is a wonderful place for reflection... but I'm sure that the people there were wondering about the old guy sitting there weeping and smoking a cigar....

There was a lot of reminiscing going on and I was picking up on it only peripherally, mostly keeping an eye on Karen... she didn't seem to tire out, she was so happily conversing with her brother and sister and cousins.

However, she is getting some pedal edema... probably a sign of congestive heart failure, but possible from the cancer growing somewhere in her abdomen... at any rate, I asked the nurse to ask the doctor is she could give her a diuretic. So far, it isn't really uncomfortable for her.

I left about 16:00, and I told her that I would call her at 18:00... but she must have her phone turned off, dammit. O'well, she knows my number, and if she needs me she'll call.

Her cousing Jan needed some furniture, so we gave her Karen's folks dining room set and the two end chairs that we hadn't sold, and Jan's husband John came over and picked them up this afternoon. That will make room for the two new recliners that she bought us....

And I am just O'so tired... I feel that a spring is winding up inside of me, tighter and tighter, and I can't do a damned thing about it.